This week The Atlantic published “Ukraine and the Words that Lead to Mass Murder” by Anne Applebaum. She quotes a character in the novel Everything Flows by Soviet writer Vasily Grossman:
I’m no longer under a spell, I can see now that the kulaks were human beings. But why was my heart so frozen at the time? When such terrible things were being done, when such suffering was going on all around me? And the truth is that I truly didn’t think of them as human beings. “They’re not human beings, they’re kulak trash”—that’s what I heard again and again, that’s what everyone kept repeating.
It seemed….familiar.
I consider the Russian propaganda narrative, the one saturating their news feeds – that Ukrainians are Nazis. Degenerates.
Drug addicts.
Russophobes.
Trying to destroy us Russians.
Then I think about us here in our free, relatively peaceful, ultra-blessed country. How quickly we put down our neighbors, out of ignorance, lack of curiosity, jealousy, insecurity…
But at other times from a nobler motive – when “calling out” or “holding accountable” goes nowhere, pushing further. To deplore (not just their actions but the people themselves), to disdain, to dehumanize.
Then.. to kill?
We do it in stages. One step at a time.
We do it on social media.
Look familiar?
Here are a few narratives I’ve picked up on over my years on Facebook, both implicit and explicit. I’ve left a space at the end to reflect on our own versions.
- Police = assholes
- Blacks = thugs
- Southerners = racists
- Northerners = hypocrites
- Democrats = child murderers
- Whites = oppressors
- Mexicans = drug gangs
- Muslims = terrorists
- Christians = bigots
- Men = pigs
- Urban = elite
- Rural = backward
- Republicans = full of Hate
- Biden voters have blood on their hands.
- Trumpers are stupid.
- Scientists (and other experts) are liars.
- They want to control us. They want to impose their values on us. They want to destroy our way of life. They want to kill us.
- ________________s (insert your enemy) are trash.
How many steps? Four? Five? Before we have moved from the calling out to the disdain to the dehumanization to cynicism to apathy to killing?
What Applebaum notices in the Russian people is not self-righteous outrage (although that probably showed up at first) but cynical apathy, by design from their own government. A belief that we cannot know the truth so why bother. This reminds me of a refrain I often hear to end an uncomfortable debate: “Well, we can’t really know what’s happening. We can’t trust the experts. We can’t trust our leaders…”
Applebaum further observes that Russian propaganda focuses not on the utopia they seek but on their enemies. This brings to mind what I see around me – a trend toward grievance politics. Both on the Left and the Right. I hear far more outrage over the excesses, oversteppings, and sins of the other side than what we hope and work for.
Why hope? Does it even make a difference? Aren’t you just being naive and enabling, Pollyanna Budd?
The Warrior Emotion
Nick Cave is a musician who suffered the death of a child. Day by day he makes the choice to let his suffering crack open his heart. I find wisdom in his take on hope, not as dreamy escape or naiveté but as courageous – choosing to love. I tend to regard wisdom as the Big Perk of aging. “What are a few wrinkles when I get all this wisdom?” But it’s more than age that makes us wise. One of the wisest human beings I ever met was a teenager permanently in a wheelchair. There is a radiance in her smile, the kind you might see in the very elderly. She makes a daily choice. If I suffer and respond by making the other choice, to close my heart, then no wisdom for me.
Here’s what Cave wrote:
Unlike cynicism, hopefulness is hard-earned, makes demands upon us, and can often feel like the most indefensible and lonely place on Earth. Hopefulness is not a neutral position either. It is adversarial. It is the warrior emotion that can lay waste to cynicism. Each redemptive or loving act, as small as you like, Valerio, such as reading to your little boy, or showing him a thing you love, or singing him a song, or putting on his shoes, keeps the devil down in the hole. It says the world and its inhabitants have value and are worth defending. It says the world is worth believing in. In time, we come to find that it is so.
Wow. Right?
That list of “narratives” I compiled above? It’s only a sampling. And I’ve been just as guilty as you of perpetuating these stereotypes of our enemy-neighbors.
But that is not who I want to be.
Keeping ourselves in check
I want to do better in my corner of the world. Here is my commitment:
- To guard against these dangers in my own outlook and my family’s.
- To check how I think about others, especially those I find hard to understand.
- To remind myself to acknowledge their humanity.
Will you join me?
To start, I’d like to recommend two books:
- Monica Guzman’s “I Never Thought About it That Way.” Read it along with me. I find her insight extremely relevant to our current situation, and her humility refreshing. When we are finished, I will review. And we can discuss.
- Amanda Ripley’s “High Conflict” (now out in paperback!). I will re-read this book that’s been so influential on me over the last year. And I’ll finally write a proper review. Probably not until the summer. The review may not be timely, but the book sure is.
Here’s to waking up from the spell. Here’s to bravery. To hope. Here’s to cultivating that “warrior emotion” so that in time we find the world is indeed worth believing in and defending.
As always, thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts and insights here on FlushtheBlog. Always a thought-provoking read! This essay was both disturbing and inspiring as I suspect was its intent. The “narratives” from social media that you listed were difficult to read…hard to process. I do accept that there are people that think those things, but, honestly,…not in my world. Perhaps out of apathy, perhaps out of disgust, perhaps out of weariness,… I seem to have (mostly) successfully filtered out a great deal of such bullshit in my life. I’ve deliberately cultivated my social media feeds so that I no longer see posts that incite and inflame,…nor validate and affirm. Social media, for me, has come full-circle and is again a medium for friends and family to share photos of vacation photos and life events, be it exciting or mundane. Newsflash,… if you refuse to bite, the bait goes away!
As for the inspirational aspect of your essay,… I echo your pledge. I love your references and your reading recommendations. However, I admit that my efforts will be less “overt” and more subtle. I’m less likely to facilitate moderation as I am to take a hard pass on the acrimony all together. Just eliminate it from my life. Remember that vintage poster from the 70’s?… “Suppose they had a war and nobody came.’ Perhaps that’s cowardly of me. Sorry.
Your inspiration also comes from who you are. I will continue to surround myself personally with people that uplift and inspire. It is highly unlikely that I would spend quality time with anyone that openly processes any of the narratives you list.
And Courtney, I have ENORMOUS respect and admiration for your dedication to the mission of encouraging civil discord. Truly I do! You are amazing and I have no doubt that you WILL move the needle, whether its en masse or for just a few. Keep it up, girl!
Thank you so much, Barb! I hear you on making your social media work for you. But my concern is the continued siloing that deepens our divide. These “narratives,” as I call them, are perceptions I’ve picked up on over the course of many years, and many, if not most, are implicit. For example, Idon’t think any of my friends would say those words about black people, but videos they choose to share (black people looting, for instance), IMO, feed into that narrative. I’d say the same about videos people choose to share of the police. If someone wants to share video of an officer showing kindness, someone on the right may have no qualms about it, but someone on the left may worry they are ignoring violence against POC, that their friends may judge them as painting the police in a positive light, etc. Thank you, as always – so much – for your encouragement, support, and friendship. And for being such an amazing role model.
While I’d much rather do this over coffee or wine,… You demonstrated my point precisely. Social media is for socializing. To all my friends that use FB and Insta to express political opinions or share THEIR perception of the “news,”… forgive me for not engaging. I’m not going down the rabbit holes,…not even a little,…not even the rabbit holes that I find personally validating. Again, FB algorithms are very good at giving you more of what you engage in, and weaning out what gets none of your attention. Imagine if the whole world stopped trying to express opinions, stopped trying to convince people of their opinion, stopped seeking validation, just STOPPED. I know how unrealistic that notion is. But like anything,… “let it start with me.” Because I wonder… Would hate still exist without social media? Of course it would! But without legs, would it be as harmful? To be continued with wine glasses in our hands please! (and in the meantime, don’t hate me for “sticking my head in the sand.” …it’s much more pleasant down here 😊).
My focus here isn’t on social media. Social media accelerates the problem for sure, but I observe these (often implicit) narratives elsewhere – news media, signs people put up outside their homes, everyday conversations.
And you don’t need my forgiveness. Nor my permission to share your opinion or even to have one.
You’re my good friend, and from where I sit the way you live your life – constantly serving other people, all kinds of people – is the very best answer to our problems. You, my friend, are the hands and feet of Jesus.